One of my favorite points that William made was, "So many people think that the playroom is Son-Rise. The playroom isn't Son-Rise. You are Son-Rise. It is your attitude, love, acceptance and perception that make up Son-Rise and create the healing force." That could not be more true! The dialogue process was lovely. I had the opportunity to explore a situation that I have not been thrilled with. I've also not been thrilled with the fact that I can't really change it. Although I was initially stumped, I really appreciated his question, "I understand that this is the situation that you are in and that it is not the situation that you want to be in. But it is the situation that you are in, so why hate it?" Heh. Interesting. After some exploration I began to understand what he was really talking about. If I'm angry, frustrated or hating a situation, I'm sending a message to Danniah that will make her feel uneasy or unsure. That is never the goal. Instead if I can hold the fact that I want the situation to be different, but it is the situation we are in right now and essentially say to her, "here we are! Have the best time while you're here!" then I am setting her up to feel comfortable and happy, even if the situation is far from perfect. Son-Rise definitely happens outside of the playroom.
The four points I really took away from my consultation were 1. Always respond to the first "no" 2. You are Son-Rise, not the playroom. It's the loving acceptance that makes it all work 3. when you join have your own experience and don't stare at her waiting. Just glance up, celebrate eye contact when you get it and build at all the green lights. 4.Have a plan for a game that you might want to try when you get a green light.
I shared this realization with all of our volunteers. One of them, Alyssa C., noted, "to her it's probably like you're just sitting there reading books together." We both laughed. That was exactly it! She hit the nail on the head! She then said, "sometimes it's the little things that are so important and make all the difference." She is so right about that!
Joining is about syncing into the situation, enjoying it, having wants without needing them. Check out the short video below. Raun and Bears join each other as they get to know one of their staff member's babies. They are in sync, enjoying their own experience. Notice how Bears looks up occasionally and checks in with Raun as he continues moving and chanting. It's being fully present in the moment, enjoying every aspect of the moment that creates a beautiful symphony that moves a relationship to new heights.